For many across America disaster grief is financial

Disasters grief felt on hills, streets and beyond

Today our nation has experienced a nail biting experience as our stock market hits an all time low of 778 point drop. Disaster grief is not only for those times when there is a hurricane danger or a wildfire that roars out of control in some canyon. It is also the terror barrier that affects homes, Wall Street and Capitol Hill when the Dow drops the most in any one day in history. There are all kinds of grief victims in a disaster even a financial disaster.

For those who have lost a great deal of money today there will be a need for a great deal for grief support as people climb out of the situation that we find ourselves in. Today the streets are not littered with broken branches, uprooted trees and smashed windows filled with flooding and mud. Instead the financial earthquake to our nation and financial institutions has resulted in litter of dashed hopes for a quick rescue. Broken dreams and uprooted lives will be what is most felt in the days and weeks ahead. Smashed confidence in leadership in our financial markets and in government is the order for the day. Lives will be filled with floods of uncertainty and mistrust.

Today the country and many parts of the world are seeing the liter of hopes, dreams and hard work. Today many lost more than dollars and bank accounts. Today for many with the failed bailout on Capitol hill they have lost hope in the financial markets.

There is no quick way to get over disaster grief no matter what kind it is. There is no quick or sure-fire ways that can help a person though the tears and sorrow related to financial disaster grief. The grief and pain is so great that it can not be alleviated with a few dollars or a generic sayings.

Tonight there will be many a pain-filled heart and home. Many will be filled with fear and disaster anxiety.

Tonight many financial disaster victims will need to just sit and be with the issues of their pain and loss. There is nothing that can be done but to be visited by the sorrow and disillusionment.

Sitting with the grief and loss of a financial devastation is the first steps needed in the process of disaster recovery. Yes there will be disaster recovery. It will not be fast and it will not be painless – it never is. But it can be done.

In the days and weeks ahead the pain of loss will feel insurmountable and paralyzing. The initial blow is so stinging that it can feel like it has taken the breath of hope - life filled living away.

The landscape of financial grief will have its highs and its lows. It can not be done alone. Individually and collectively we will need to share in grief support.

In time there will be useful insights, opportunities and brighter days. Not today, most likely not tomorrow but it will happen. It will take time, work and trust in your own abilities and in that of our country. We will make it through this difficult and challenging time. We have the ability to become stronger at the most broken places of our lives and our financial circumstances if we are willing to work at it.

In the entries to this blog to come I will be addressing the various tasks that financial disaster victims will experience and have to work through. I hope you will share your thoughts and stories. We can do this together.

Dr. Terrie Modesto, Disaster Grief Specialist

Website: www.trainforahurricane.com Blog: www.hurricane-prepared-ness.blogspot.com

Truck bomb triggers disaster grief around the world

Disaster grief expressed in different ways

Today many will experience grief and sorrow for those who have died in the truck bomb in Islamabad, Pakistan at the Marriott Hotel. Disaster grief rings out from the parliament building and the prime minister’s home to the smallest village far out in the distant lands of this proud country. Disaster grief and recovery starts today for them and for others around the world.

But it is not only those who live in Pakistan that are mourning and filled with shock and disbelief that their loved one has died due to terrorism. Individuals and families around the world are crying and starting the much dreaded process of funeral planning because their loved one was staying at the Marriott Hotel in Islamabad, Pakistan. .

A new page in the lives of these grievers is turning and now loved ones must choose funeral readings for someone who has died a long way from home. In the hours, days and weeks to come families around the world will walk from large and small cemeteries when they have buried the dead that they called, mother, father, brother, sister, friend, lover, daughter, son, neighbor, co-worker, husband or wife.

For those that are alive, they will begin dealing with grief. Violent deaths are most often complicated grief situations. For many mourners, grief support and grief counseling will help the anguish of coping with grief that they never got to say good bye to their loved one before the truck bomb blast destroyed lives and dreams.

Bomb victims are not only those who die directly from a truck bomb explosion. It also includes all those that now sit at funeral rites, listening to a funeral prayer or grief poems. After the funeral speeches are over, all those who are bomb victims will say good bye to a much too short a time together.

Soon the funeral parlors will be empty, the funeral cards will be put away and the funeral director will attend to the needs of others who grieve the death of a loved one for other reasons. Some who grieve these truck bomb deaths in Islamabad, Pakistan will seek out grief resources that can help to sort out the compounded and complex issues that include their own personal war on terrorism deep in their own hearts.

So how do people get through such difficult times of disaster grief? Many find it helpful to have traditional funeral services that have expressions of grief that are comforting and well known to all that attend with hearts full of sorrow.

Others will go on their own personalized funeral quest in more unconventional ways. Some will play funeral songs rooted in hundreds of years of tradition while others will quietly go to grave monuments touch the grave headstones with a familiar name newly etched in stone and hum or sing some of the favorite shared songs repeated so many times during the days of joy and laughter together.

There are as many ways to express grief as there are people and cultures. Some have funeral wakes before the Irish funeral, other will hear military taps and gun salutes at a military funeral. Many Catholics will have a funeral mass while others not so religious inclined will have a private home funeral or a cemetery funeral for just close friends.

During the various ways of saying good bye publicly to a loved one that has died, there can be flowers for funeral expressions of sorrow as well as memorial display boards with funeral pictures showing times of joy like weddings, holidays and vacations.

There is no one way to share grief at funeral memorials or to experience a ‘good grief’ just right. It all depends on the state of the heart of the person who grieves and the willingness at a funeral program to offer your love, share your sorrow and remember the gift of the loved one who has died so tragically.

Please join me at my website Train For A Hurricane http://trainforahurricane.com

and Blog Hurricane Preparedness

http://hurricane-prepared-ness.blogspot.com/

COMMENTS WELCOMED!

Please share your thoughts, disaster grief and recovery tips and stories here on this blog.

All I ask is that everyone be respectful and sensitive of each other and that identifying information about a person who is not the author be limited to protect their privacy.

Emotional storm shelter in disaster and recovery

Hurricane preparedness means disaster planning and recovery for the short and long term.

Fearful journey back to Hurricane Ike ground zero – disaster grief and recovery begins

Hundreds and even thousands of families are being allowed to journey back to see what is left if anything of their homes and communities after Hurricane Ike ravaged the Texas and Louisiana Gulf Coast. Not since hurricane katrina has so much hurricane damage been done by the sheer force of wind and water.

First steps into the long disaster recovery journey

When assessing hurricane damage one must assess it from the practical side of monetary loss but also from the emotional and community life aspect as well. For those who are facing the devastating destruction of their homestead, the emotional impact will be deeply felt for years and lifetimes ahead. It is not just the house that is destroyed but also the community and the sense of wellbeing that was associated with the home that will compound the disaster event.

As those who have experienced hurricane damage from such famous hurricanes as hurricane charlie, hurricane andrew, hurricane wilma and hurricane hugo to name just a few will tell you, the hurricane response is physical, emotional and financial. After the emergency response to physical safety issues of individuals has finished, the longer term emotional hurricane rescue ad recovery will need to happen. That is not an easy time for anyone involved. It can feel like hurricane force winds beating at your heart .

Often all is left are left are tears and disaster management support

Emotional disaster management needs to take place. Many will want to push ahead at lightning speed and try to spend 12-18 hour each day if possible working at storm clean up. The emotional backlash from this can be significant.

No matter how strong and practical a person is, emotionally, it takes time to grieve the disaster loss. It doesn’t matter how much emotional hurricane preparation you have done before the storm or contingency planning you do as your journey back down familiar roads that you hardly recognize due to the damage -- nothing can prepare you for the intense emotions, tears, anguish and despondency one can feel when a disaster hits home.

The desire for an emotional hurricane shutter to shield the heart from the pain

Many who have gone through a devastating hurricane season and personally experienced tremendous loss will tell even years later that when first seeing their damaged or destroyed home, they wish they have could have just pull down an emotional hurricane shutter around their hearts and emotions and shielded it from the pain of such loss.

It sure would be nice if that was possible. Unfortunately there are no physical hurricane panels that can protect someone from the pain and anguish of a natural disaster.

Even though there are no hurricane panels that can save the heart from disaster grief, there are ways for you and your family can to start to get through the anguish. During those first few days, friends and family can be the emotional hurricane protectors to help you to get through the initial moments of disaster grief.

It is vital that you do not make any decisions during this time. Your emotional state of mind is more turbulence than a category 5 hurricane with bands of grief, fear and loss swirling around inside.

Often when we are overwhelmed with the severity of loss, as well as the magnitude of the issues that a person must face frequently due to a disaster, our ability to cope with the situation is impossible to do alone. It is during these times that the major a part of the disaster recovery will be through friends and family that can help provide a respite with some personal disaster management support while you begin the long road of disaster recovery physically and emotionally.

Disaster Cleanup

Allow these caring friends and loved ones to help with the initial disaster cleanup and salvaging for personal items from the damaged home. Let them take the pictures of the home and make phone calls that may be necessary. You don’t need to do everything yourself. Delegation of disaster cleanup tasks will help get the job done faster without tremendous stress all falling on your shoulders.

Sound disaster support

There will be volunteer services that can be of help and comfort as well as provide important information for disaster follow-up services. Get all the information you can. Many of these organizations will include the Red Cross, Salvation Army are well other recognized disaster support services. There will also be lesser known disaster support services established locally will be very willing to offer support and help. Utilize their help and care -- that is what they are there for. Get as much information including as many of the handouts as possible.

It is unfortunate that during some of the more difficult days of your life you will need to also be very aware that not everyone is there for your best interest. There will be scam artists, individuals who will try to take advantage of you and the situation.

There is a time for everything including tears and disaster recovery process

Avoid making any decisions without talking it over with a trusted friend and / or family members that you have know from BEFORE the hurricane disaster and NEVER sign anything without a trusted confidant and / or lawyer to look it over. Even if you feel that all you want to do is to pull down the emotional hurricane shutter over your eyes and heart and walk away, this is not the time to make such important life choices. Give your self a week or so to adjust to the realities of the hurricane damage situation to your property and life before even thinking of making any long term drastic action.

Please Visit

Please join me at my website Train For A Hurricane http://trainforahurricane.com

and Blog Hurricane Preparedness

http://hurricane-prepared-ness.blogspot.com/

COMMENTS WELCOMED!

Please share your thoughts, disaster grief and recovery tips and stories here on this blog.

All I ask is that everyone be respectful and sensitive of each other and that identifying information about a person who is not the author be limited to protect their privacy.

Welcome to Disaster Grief & Recovery Blog

Welcome~

Welcome to the Disaster Grief and Recovery Blog. My name is Dr. Terrie Modesto and I’ll be your principal blogger for this site. Thank you for visiting.

If you are experiencing disaster grief and recovery issues, I hope that you will find this blog f help and support. Please let me know if there are topics that you would like for me to address it the very near future.

How do people get over disasters?

Numerous people have been asking me questions about disaster grief recently. The biggest question asked is “How do people get over disasters as Hurricane Ike, Tropical Storm Hanna etc. and all the others?” I wish there was a simple and quick answer or a list of things that could be done. It would be nice if there were words that could be magically said that instantly cure the grief, loss, pain and anguish of a devastating event like a hurricane or flood.

Those who help with disaster grief and disaster recovery

When a disaster happens, there are a number of people who have wonderful hearts and want to help. Without such caring hands and kinds gestures of empathy and love disaster victims would have an even harder time their disaster recovery.

There are also a number of people who are not trained or well train in disaster grief support and grief counseling services that mean well and who come to the aid of those in need and are not equipped to meet the numerous needs and concerns of the disaster victims. It is important to offer care and support to those who hurt but the vulnerability of such grief stricken individuals also need the well trained both professional and volunteer to assist in many disaster grief situations.

Others come to the side of grief stricken families for all kinds of reasons and motives. Many of those motives are good and notable yet the information and services offered are not sound based in well established professional grief and bereavement practices and support care. For others, the reasons for helping are less noble and honorable. There are those who have little or no qualified training disaster grief services who are looking to make quick money off the heavy laden hearts of those who grieve and over whelmed by the tasks of emotional, physical and financial disaster recovery.

No quick way to get over disaster grief

What is known is that there are no quick or sure-fire ways that can help a person through the tears and sorrow related to disaster grief. No one, no matter how powerful they are or how much they want to remove the pain of disaster grief are ever able to take away the sorrow and loss of a such a catastrophic event. Only time, compassion, hope and tears can alleviate some of the most painful sting of a disaster.

Even with that all that said, there are ways to help in the emotional journey and process of disaster recovery. On this blog we will be looking at the numerous issues that confront an individual, a family, a business and even a community that faces the pain of and the emotional grief work of disaster recovery. We’ll also examine how people grieve after a disaster. No two people grieve the exact same way over the exact same disaster.

Intention for Disaster Grief and Recovery Blog

Just like grief recovery itself, this blog will be a journey filled most likely with most every possible emotion from sadness, tears, fear, sorrow, anger, frustration, to moments of laughter, hope and success in various tasks of grief work and disaster recovery. These are just some of the emotions one can experience while in the midst of a disaster event

There is so much that confronts a person when dealing with a disaster. This is a place that can be an emotional storm shelter and support niche out of the raging chaos of disaster grief. Here is a place where individuals from all kinds of disasters and all walks of life from individual house fires to mass disaster fatalities can read about various issues and ideas concerning different aspects of disaster grief recovery and to also share their stories, ideas, suggestions and incident concerning their disaster experiences.

Disaster grief will have a significant influence in how individuals, families and communities will reconstruct their lives in their disaster recovery journey. Needless to say it is important to have the best possible disaster grief and support information and care possible. That is the intention of this blog. Disaster Greif and Recovery Blog will give the highest quality information and resources that we possibly can.

From time to time recognized and established thanatologist, grief counselors and grief therapists as well as others in the related fields of disaster grief care services will also be invited to post informative and helpful blog articles on this site as well. Thanatologist and grief specialist who wish to post articles on this blog are invited to contact me at the email listed to discuss this possibility further.

About Dr. Terrie Modesto

So who is Dr. Terrie Modesto? Why does she think that she can offer well informed disaster grief and recovery to all those who experience grief and loss issues caused by a natural disaster or human inflicted terrorist attack?

Those are good questions that you SHOULD ask yourself as you read this introductory blog. All who are dealing with disaster grief personally or know someone who is dealing with disaster grief and recovery need to ensure that the information receive is sound and accurate.

To answer that question: I am a ‘thanatologist’ a specialist in dying, death, bereavement and grief. I earned my PhD in Thanatology from The Union Institute and University in Cincinnati Ohio in 2001 and have been a full member of the Association of Death Education And Counseling (ADEC) since 1997 which is the leading professional association internationally in the specific area of death education and counseling.

I specialize in disaster grief and bereavement care support for individuals and communities. So far I have written over 60 books, academic courses and training manuals and lecture extensively nationally and internationally. In 1999 I was appointed Chief Thanatologist and evaluator for the OCEMEX 2000 critical incident exercise Ft. Walden, FL involving national and regional emergency response agencies and organizations. This was the first time that a critical incident thanatologist was assigned to an emergency response exercise associated with unconventional concepts in weapons of mass destruction.

Personally I have lived through my Grandmother’s flooded home, tornados, blizzards and hurricanes including Hurricane Isabel that flooded out part of my local community I was just moving into. I have also worked with those affected in numerous natural disaster situations and human afflicted terrorist events.

Please join me at my website Train For A Hurricane http://trainforahurricane.com

and Blog Hurricane Preparedness

http://hurricane-prepared-ness.blogspot.com/

COMMENTS WELCOMED!

Please share your thoughts, disaster grief and recovery tips and stories here on this blog.

All I ask is that everyone be respectful and sensitive of each other and that identifying information about a person who is not the author be limited to protect their privacy.